March 22, 2011

{by your side}

music has been my one saving grace in the last 48 hours. well, not my only saving grace, but most definitely a giant help...and Jesus music more than anything. there's something about pure heartfelt words & beautiful melodies that simply brings peace of mind amidst all the chaos.

last night i was reminded of the plain & simple truth that God is everywhere, with you at all times, faithfully by your side. sure, set aside God time is nice, but often life gets in the way, and when we don't get that hour of quiet sit-down time we get frustrated, irked, and distance ourselves from God. at least i do. but even in life, in the madness, He. is. there. don't you think that God probably often looks at us and just rolls {lovingly} rolls His eyes? here we are stressing out about our plans, griping about the lack of sleep, dreading the piles of homework, and there He is, right next to us waiting patiently for us to notice Him. it's that easy.

this is all temporary. that's the other thought that has been bouncing around. school, work, to-do lists...none of those things will truly matter in the long run. this semester has definitely been a "school on the back burner" kind of semester. my straight A, type A self struggles with that...the spontaneous-just-live-life side says, "hey deb? live a little." the grades, the essays, the exams, yep they're important in the here and now, but thirty years from now you won't recall that awful bio midterm you had in college...you'll recall the people, the adventures, the experiences...relationships, memories, and friendships. i don't think i'll be 49 (i like odd numbers), and say, i regret not studying harder, not spending more time in the library, not pulling all-nighters. i think i would regret not building into the people who are in my life at this moment, for a special reason. i think i'd regret not slowing down to listen to God, missing opportunities, or blinding myself to the simply joys of life.

i'm not saying blow it all. i'm saying there has to be balance in everything, that the to-do lists, the demands of life cannot dictate our feelings, our relationships, and especially not our relationship with God. sometimes you have to just take a break from the studying and have some God time. it's ok to do that. the half hour less of mindlessly flipping through your flashcards will not determine the rest of your life. cultivating your spiritual life and taking care of yourself will. and that's that.

{apologies for the helter skelter writing; sometimes the processing and the thinking just aren't in sync ;]}

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