March 7, 2010

.lessons learned and constantly relearned.

i wrote this a few months ago but still find it incredibly relevant to my everyday life so i thought i'd share :

comparing yourself to other people is simply a waste of time. and yet i do it all the time, and maybe you do too. it sometimes seems that everyone else has it better off. a girl might be prettier. might get the guy. have the cute clothes. have the perfect life. she's the girl who has it all. sometimes it feels like i get the short end of the stick, and i spend so much time wallowing in all of it. and tonight God finally smacked me in the head and it all clicked.

in bible study we were studying matt 5, the beautitudes, the sermon on the mount. and in those first 13 verses Jesus says "blessed are the meek, those who mourn, the poor" all the characteristics of people we don't naturally admire. in this world, and i speak for myself, we admire the strong, the beautiful, the wealthy. like i mentioned earlier, it's the girl who has it all that you wish you were. and that's when God shot that down for me. because according to Him, it's the broken that he loves on, that he admires, that he exhorts. God doesn't give a squat about the things that we care about. he looks at the heart, and no matter what others think of you, HE loves you.

i love to think that we are all part of a huge puzzle. God's puzzle. like a puzzle, each of us is shaped in a certain way. we are molded, by God, in order to fit into the piece of the puzzle that can only be ours. we are designed uniquely. a certain part of the picture is painted on us in order to complete the whole image. if we ignore who God created us to be, if we try to replace who we truly are by trying to be someone else, then that piece of God's plan is missing, and his picture will not be complete.
i always imagine God sitting in heaven, looking down at this earth, looking down at His creation...sometimes grieving, sometimes with joy. and when He looks down, He expects us, as His children, to have found our place in his picture, to be living in exactly the way he created us to live. you can't fight it. God made you, and Psalm 139 says He's already got it all figured why do we try so hard to be someone different? why do we fight the mold, fight the shape, and inherently go against our very selves. He saw us before we were even created, before we were even conceived. He knows.

tonight, after a stressful past few days, God once again reminded me that i am created in his image. he reminded me that without him, i am nothing. he reminded me that i am who i am and no one can take my place. you are who you are, and no one will ever be able to replace you, no one can ever take your place in the puzzle.

.the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13 : The Love Chapter :

Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking,
It is not easily angered,
It keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil,
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts,
Always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

March 6, 2010

.putting God on the list.

friends. family. school. work. piles of homework. facebook. a good book. an addictive t.v. show. a chick flick. relationships. retail therapy. a killer set of heels. taking pictures. boys. the internet. all of these are just a few of the many, many things in life that vie for our attention each and every day of our life. they are things that consume our lives. they are things that i know consume mine. and yet, they are things that will leave us drained and confused if we use them to fill the place in our heart that can only belong to God. it's something that i have struggled with in the past and continue to struggle with each and every day. i'm a list person. i have a very very clingy relationship with my planner. every morning i write down what i have to get done. and strangely enough, rarely does my list say : spend time with God. it's something that i know i SHOULD do every day, so i assume i will. but i don't. i get up, turn on the computer, take a shower, pick out an outfit, watch the news, and before you know it it's time to go to class and my day has already taken off. and in all that morning time, i completely forgot to spend time with the one Person who has never ever stopped loving me. it's shameful. and i hate to admit it. and it's something i am constantly striving to change. to put God on my to do list and to make Him a priority in my life. i hope to be that person who is so dependent on God that it would be against their very nature to spend a whole day without God. i SHOULD be that person. and i'm incredibly grateful that He hasn't given up on me yet. His patience baffles me, but i won't fight it! and i am oh so thankful for it.

March 1, 2010

learning to ride a bike...

..a weird title i know, but this whole blogging thing is going to be like learning to ride a bike for me. i've had the urge to start one for months...and now i've finally checked another thing off my list! this will be more of a journal for eclectic collection of all sorts of things : epiphanies. God moments. funny memories. amazing quotes. sporadic events. whatever i need to get out of my heart and onto paper...

i hope you enjoy!