it's been quite the year, people

i knew this day would come.

the day when i'd glance back at this year and just sigh with a 'wow'.

so far, in 2013 we: 

were engaged

completed another full semester of college

finished my thesis

completed an internship

both graduated with our bachelor's degrees

applied to the credential program

travelled to europe

attended several weddings

planned our own wedding

moved out

moved in to our new apartment

spent almost a month in china

vacationed in hawaii

spent several weekends/weeks up north

quit a job

changed jobs

GOT MARRIED

honeymooned

moved in together

and we have consumed probably 413 cups of coffee, shed many tears, laughed our hearts out, adventured together, and learned more about life, each other, and our Jesus than ever before.

and there are still four months left in 2013. it has been and will be without a doubt one of the most transformational, challenging, rewarding, and unforgettable years of our life.

this week has been the first week of our 'new routine' and we love it, absolutely love it. when we were engaged, people would often ask what we were most looking forward to about marriage (besides the obvious!) and we would always tell them that we were so excited to just do life together - to wake up next to each other every day and start the day as a team, to merge everything we had as individuals into our new together life, and to end every day side by side. and that has been, without a doubt, the best part. last night was the first time we were out with a group of people and then got to drive home together, without having to say goodnight - i was ridiculously excited about it. 

but a new routine also means lots of change - good change, but lots of it. it's things like figuring out a house-cleaning routine, tackling projects together, being together but not really being together, discussing everything with each other - plans, time, finances, purchases, our home - finding time to rest but still finding time to be intentional with each other and those around us. i know that it will take a while to settle in to everything, and there is no one i'd rather navigate this new chapter with. 

above all, God has been good, so good to us. He provides when we seem to have run out of resources, He unexpectedly showers us with blessings, He has surrounded us with a strong community, and He loves us. that in itself is all we could ever need. even if He took everything away, we would still have love - for each other, and for Him. 

so here we are, married, head over heels in love, and so ready to embrace the days, months, and years that still lie ahead of us.

and to all of you that have carried us up to this point, all of you who have filled us with encouragement, wisdom, guidance, and support, those of you who made our wedding day more magical than we could have ever hoped, and all of you who are behind us, praying for us, and believing in us - thank you. 

sundays // things are changing

happy monday, friends! i hope you all had a happy weekend, and for us southern californians, that you survived the heat (yet, again - seriously, we're ready for fall). 

yesterday was one of those special sundays - some of it good, some of it just different. about once a month, i get a chance to lead worship during our main service and i absolutely LOVE it - especially when i get to lead with my sweet friend Rachel! it is such a blessing to lead others in music, and it is my heart that God would be glorified through those times and that i would simply become an instrument He uses. we sang the most amazing song yesterday - have you heard David Crowder's new song "After All (Holy)"? oh man, go look it up and listen. i was humming it for the rest of the day. 

church had a sense of anticipation over it yesterday, because just this past week, we received a letter announcing our senior pastor's resignation. after serving as the senior pastor for 20 years and attending Bethany for 31 years, this is a huge change; but, i have a certain peace that God is in control. my heart just grieves along with them as they leave the family they love and know so well and step into new things. but God is good, and He has mighty things in store, i'm sure. my respect for our pastor and his family increased yesterday. he and his wife both showed so much grace and wisdom as they communicated with us and explained their situation. we are so lucky to have served under them for such a long time.

but for the next 6 weeks, we have a few last chances to hear from our pastor, and i am so looking forward to the wisdom and reminders he will impart on us in his last few sundays! yesterday, we continued walking through James and were challenged not to show favoritism - that was convicting. it is easy and feels so comfortable to spend time with people you know. but Jesus was all about loving the unloved. i pray we would all have eyes to see those He would love, and not only those that are easy to love.

i am also grateful to be a part of a church that is so sensitive to God's will and constantly seeks growth. we aren't afraid of change and are led by a team that never makes decisions selfishly, but always in accordance with God's heart. this year has been full of many blows, but we are stronger. if our goal is to love God more deeply and know Him more fully, we cannot be shaken. 

yesterday was not one of those restful sundays, but instead included a lot of church work - continuing to organize the women's retreat and plan this semester was the college leadership team as well. but still, it was so good. i am so thankful to be a part of such a vibrant community and for all of the opportunities God has given me to serve. i can't wait to see what He has in store.

God is good, and i feel good. but there are things in life that really aren't good right now. heavy, tough things. spiritual attack. strained friendships. honesty that needs to happen. i am praying firmly for wisdom and discernment, and for moments of rest in these next few weeks - quiet moments that i will wisely spend with my Jesus. 

xoxo,

deb

trusting Him

for those of you reading this, if that's anyone, today has been a day...let me tell you.

ever have one of those conversations where five bombs are dropped on you and you're sitting there after an hour going, 'um, what happened?.' well, that happened today. it's all for the better i know that, but T and i were sitting there with a friend of ours and both said, 'what is happening?!.' so believe me, 2012 is bringing a million changes. a lot of is still confidential, so unfortunately, i'm going to have to be a little vague in this post, but hopefully you still get something out of it...that's the hope, always!

first big brain-bomb...

travis and i have been asked to co-lead a summer mission's trip, and we are both so so stoked about it. we met with our mission's pastor today to talk about his experience there and his hope for the summer team, and how we will play into all that. a part of me is so excited about the opportunity, so excited about what God is doing in this country, and so excited to visit the missionaries there, some very dear friends of ours.

the other half of me is terrified. when we were first approached about leading the team, we though at first that just meant travis, which would make sense. he's been on a ton of trips, has been at bethany for a long time, and has seen and learned a lot throughout his time there. it seems natural for him to step into this next level of leadership.

me, on the other hand...i've been on one mission's trip with bethany (argentina, last summer), and i've only been at the church for about 2 years...i really only feel like i became more plugged in during this past year. i still think of myself as a newbie, but over the last six months, the Lord has opened door after door for me to serve. i haven't really asked for anything; it's like God has just placed opportunities into my lap. in response, i've had to step out in faith and serve with a willing heart. sometimes, i feel like that's all i have to offer. He does the rest. this mission's trip is another one of those opportunities.

co-leading this trip over the summer would be a huge leap of faith, for me personally, and for us as a couple. we'd be leading adults older than us; i'd be leading the women. resolving conflict, administering things efficiently, building into them, and communicating effectively with T, our team, and the missionaries there all come along with the job, and i feel so incapable of doing it all well. at the same time though, it's in our weaknesses that God is glorified, so in one way, i'm glad i don't feel equipped for this. if we take on the role, that means God is doing the work - we're just his vessels.

on a relational level, i think this opportunity could bring huge growth between T and i. as leaders, we'd be held to an even higher level of accountability. if there isn't unity between us, unity between the team will be weakened. working together will require constant communication and an attitude of humility. the experience would teach me a lot about respecting him as a man and as a leader. i can be stubborn, opinionated, and head-strong. thankfully, so can travis, and he can put me in my place (one of the reasons i love him so).

preparation for this trip would begin now. it would require monthly leadership training, and constant prayer. this is the first major decision we've had to make, and that's exciting to me! it means praying together, discussing our hesitations and expectations, and working together to serve the Lord. if T goes into ministry, it's a little taste of what our life would look like. in my heart of hearts, i couldn't be more excited.


...and number 2:

i'm up for a promotion at work, and i had an interview for the position this morning. it went well i think, but if anything, i might have been a little straightforward. which isn't a bad thing...i don't think. taking this position would require more time, but also give me a challenge and more pay (both of which would be great!). but work is not my priority. in fact, on my list of priorities, it falls at like...number 5. and i told my manager so. truly, this whole situation is in God's hands too. if my manager is looking for a hard worker, then hopefully i'll get the job. if she's just looking for someone to do her beck and call and sell themselves to Jamba, then nope, forget it. we'll see if honesty really is the best policy...

i have absolutely no idea what God has in store for this year, but i'm 100% that He has a great plan in store. i could worry, or i could just simply trust Him. i'll choose option B.