June 2, 2014


oh my goodness, what happened to april + may?! remember how i wanted to start posting monthly goals this year? well maybe it should become a goal to actual post my monthly goals. but you know what? april + may were full of good things, and while i may not have check off goals on a list, i definitely still got ish done. now it's summer and i can breathe a little easier. my last final has been submitted, my last paper is done, and i survived a tough year of senioritis (seriously, i can't even count the number of classes i skipped, because hey, i had better things to do -youknowwhatimean?). i just know this summer will fly by - we're kicking it off with a trip to visit family this weekend - but i'm determined to soak it up before i start student teaching in the fall. 

this is the first summer where Travis and i aren't on break together, and that's different. we started dating while we were both in school, but since we've been married, he has been working full-time while i finish my credential. it's been interesting adjusting to a new pace of life. while our college schedules were pretty flexible, nothing gives with an 8-5 schedule. and while i have winter break, spring break, and summer break, travis just keeps working. it sounds silly, but this whole year i've been struggling with a lot of guilt. when i have time off during the day and my husband is still at work, i feel guilty for not working when he's working - like i'm lazy or indulgent. but that's so far from the truth. it helped when we sat down and evaluated our time, and i realized that my real full-time job is being a wife. laundry, dishes, cleaning, bills, chores, errands, grocery shopping, budget balancing - it all takes time, so much time, and it's valuable work. while travis goes out and makes dat money, my job is to hold down the home fort, to make breakfast and pack lunches and prepare meals, to make sure my husband has clean clothes for the week, to make our house a home, a place of rest and relaxation for him after a long day. AND, it's also my responsibility to take care of myself. if i can squeeze in a nap and make sure i'm also emotionally and physically refreshed when he gets home, then i should make that happen, because it's healthy, because it benefits us both in the long run. that lie that tells us we always have to busy, running ourselves into the ground, drinking 5 cups of coffee just to get through, eating on the go? it's exactly that, a lie - and it's an empty way to live. it results in stress, exhaustion, and tension, and those emotions bleed into our work, our relationships, and our health. that's not the purpose of our life. our purpose is not to keep up, to create an image that impresses others, to become successful (and really, what does that even mean?). no. we are meant to live for so much more. 

so, that's where i'm at. learning, growing, adjusting, and always wanting to thrive. and the best part of it all? we don't have to do all that stretching and growing and falling and rising up again alone. life is so much richer when it is shared with others, which is why i think i love writing these posts. maybe i'm not the most clever or powerful writer, but i always hope to be real. i want to walk through life with others, to encourage each other, to laugh when things are just WAY beyond our control, to pick each other up when days are just a little too much. so, how are you? how can i pray for you? 


// cut down on screen time - i want to devote a part of the day to updating FB, blogging, and sharing on instagram, and then i want to be DONE with it. it's become second nature to me to scroll through a feed and fill my brain with the stuff of other people's lives, and i think it's affected how i do life as well. it's a comparison trap for me - "they did that, and it worked out like this for them, so maybe i should try that to" "should i be doing this, doing that?" "i wish i had that, wore that, that my house looked like that" and it's just an unhealthy cycle. instead, i want to use those inbetween moments to just talk to God, acknowledge Him during my day, ask for HIS direction rather than comparing myself to others. so, i'm challenging myself. let's see how it goes. 
// shoot two sessions
// send thank you notes
// practice gratitude - more thankfulness, less complaining
// make care packages for the homeless
// write & send our mission support letters
// work on finishing house decor: the wall above the couch is STILL bare, and we need something over our bed. i want to finish it all before the family comes to visit in april!


// store wedding momentos
// host a 'shop my closet'
// host a worship night at our place
// spend as much time as possible with our dear friends before they move in july
// develop a regular quiet time during the day
// prepare spiritually, physically, and mentally for Kenya
// finish weddediting
// shoot three sessions
// eat more healthy - prep meals, choose healthy snacks, and eat more greens + fruits

June is officially the first month of summer, and i want to knock some things out of the park during this downtime. July will be mostly spent on preparing for, traveling to, and coming home from Kenya, and then August is the last month before student teaching, so i'm soaking June up as much as i can! wish me luck!

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